“I’m just a girl.”

This line from No Doubt’s “Just a Girl” took the internet by storm in 2024. One woman got into a car accident and used the trend to share that women shouldn’t be expected to drive. Another eagerly displayed her collection of every Stanley cup ever made, accompanied by her husband’s disapproving laughter. Another video eventually evolved into the popular “Girl Math” — if I return the $100 bag I got last week, I just made $100!

Most people saw women nurturing girlhood on their social media feeds. I saw people saying femininity meant incompetence.

I grew up a quintessential girly-girl. I begged my parents for exclusive Barbies and bows for Christmas. My sisters and I frequently visited the nearby park in our hot pink Mini Jeep when I was in elementary school. Even now, I’m emotionally attached to my pink water bottle, pink Thermos and pink backpack.

But somehow, that equates to unintelligence.

The truth is, just because someone is “girly” does not mean that they are unintelligent. We as a society, especially in young girls, have inculcated this strict doctrine. By deeming “girly-girls” as uneducated and portraying traditional masculine girls as heroic in the media, we put forth the idea that a strong female role model aligns more closely with a man. Meanwhile, women who are more traditionally feminine are seen as irresponsible, incompetent and not worth listening to.

The phrase “I’m just a girl” is a vehicle for glamorizing these negative qualities and connecting them to traditional femininity.

So why do we glorify not knowing?

It’s easier to subjugate people if they don’t know what’s capable.

When we collectively dismiss unintelligence as being “just a girl,” we support the notion that those who choose to embrace their girlhood need not be educated. We excuse ignorance by putting a bright pink bow on it, and this effect has already seeped into every aspect of the media.

The tradwife social media trend skyrocketed in 2024. Tradwives differed from the stay-at-home mom in that it emphasized mid-20th-century ideals of domestic responsibility, traditional gender roles and submission to one’s husband, the primary breadwinner.

I’m not saying a woman cannot feel truly fulfilled by becoming a tradwife, because there are undoubtedly women out there who are passionate about managing their home. But when hours of filming and editing are put into a video for the purpose of glorifying one’s lifestyle, it has the consequence of reinforcing traditional gender roles and telling girls it is the only “right” way to be a woman.

Take Tiktoker @GwenTheMilkmaid, for example. In one of her videos, Gwen is seen picking flowers in a flowy white dress. In the same clip, Gwen says that looking back to before adopting her tradwife lifestyle, she can’t believe “how clueless” she was. Gwen goes on to directly address young girls watching, saying modern culture is “lying” to them.

Gwen seems genuinely happy with her lifestyle. But her video raises the question, does that inherently mean every woman must adopt the same one?

Not every moment of a tradwife’s life is as picturesque as you see on Instagram or TikTok. Parenting expert Meg Tibayan puts it best when she theorized that it could be an attempt to restrict women’s rights and limit their potential. This archetype, a product of the feminine-to-unintelligent pipeline we’ve made in our heads, just reinforces the idea that a woman is more fulfilled when adhering to traditional gender roles.

Furthermore, we stray away from the idea that anyone traditionally feminine cannot be a strong leader. Don’t get me wrong — every girl at some point wanted to be Katniss Everdeen. After all, Katniss is tough and fiercely independent. But not every woman who has strength, emotionally or physically, has to possess traditionally masculine qualities. Every woman can be strong, even if not adhering to “manly” characteristics.

I grew up watching Disney princess movies every night. Every princess instills a sense of leadership in me. Snow White taught me that being compassionate in the face of adversity is essential. Belle taught me that abandoning judgement and being open-minded is crucial. Rapunzel taught me that naivete can be erased by questioning society and its rules. Each princess, no matter how “girly” they were, was equally as strong as Katniss.

So you can imagine my surprise when one of my friends told me her mom didn’t let her watch Disney princess movies as a little girl because she was a “feminist.”

And this wasn’t just her. Several studies argue that these movies portray princesses in a misogynistic light. While I agreed that no movie should depict that a woman needs to be saved by a man, I wondered why all traditionally feminine characters were put in these roles in the first place.

Every great female leader in the media is stereotypically masculine — Hermione Granger from “Harry Potter,” Elphaba from “Wicked” and Black Widow from “Avengers.” They all possess the assertiveness, self-reliance and stoic demeanor that characterizes the “traditional man.” The day I see a pink Avenger will be the day I change my mind.

This pattern is growing worse and worse. It is changing our perception of leadership.

We have adopted the psychological link between leadership and masculinity. This is known as the “think manager, think male” effect. Due to our pre-conceived notions for leadership, from our experiences and the media, we subconsciously compare others to our standards of leadership. As a result of these pre-conceived notions, our standards are supported by masculine characteristics. This has undermined crucial values to leadership that are considered feminine, such as empathy and emotional intelligence.

To put it simply, our brains are building a connection between leaders and men because of what we see around us.

When we repeat the twisted mantra, “I’m just a girl,” we reaffirm the belief that the uneducated and incompetent female stereotype is directly connected to more feminine characteristics. We excuse unintelligence for just being…female.

These small details in the media seem like nothing more than good fun. But they’re rapidly snowballing into icy barriers that are thrown again and again at women. We as a society should allow women to choose to either present themselves as a “girly-girl” or not without any fear of being seen as stupid. Because at the end of the day, underneath the makeup, glitter and glam, we all have a mind that deserves to be recognized and a voice that deserves to be heard.

And that’s something no bright pink bow can hide.